Life Takes Detours

How to Preserve a Husband:

Be careful in your selection-- Do not choose too young.

When once selected, give your entire thought to preparation for domestic use.

Some insist on keeping them in a pickle, others are constantly getting them in hot water. This makes them sour, hard and sometimes bitter.

Even poor varieties may be made sweet, tender and good by garnishing them with patience, well sweetened with love and seasoned with kisses.

Wrap them in a mantle of charity. Keep warm with a steady fire of domestic devotion, and serve with peaches and cream....Thus prepared they will keep for years.

Recipe For Preserving Children:

1 large grassy field

1 hot sun

6 children(assorted) flowers

3 small dogs deep blue sky

1 narrow pebbly brook

Mix the children with the dogs, and empty into the field. Stir continuously. Sprinkle the field with flowers, pour the brook gently over the pebbles, Cover all with a deep blue sky and bake in the hot sun.

When children are well browned, they may be removed, set to cool in a bath tub filled with warm water...